<table><tr><th>From: </th><th></th></tr><tr><td>Sent:</td><td>Fri 10/29/2010 8:32:19 PM</td></tr><tr><td>Subject:</td><td>Report # 143: A day at the spa</td></tr></table>

Trick or treat!

I keep giving out my landline at work and people keep complaining that I never pick up... Well, I haven't had a phone for the past 4 months since I switched jobs and moved to a new office... What can I say, things move slowly in Abu Dhabi, but hopefully I'll get a phone by end of the month - I'm not sure which month, but at the end ofit...

SoI'm sitting at the spa tucked in between cat-woman and elephant-woman getting a pedicure. Well, I'm getting a pedicure, but I really don't know all the treatments these hideous women are getting. Someone should tell them there is only so much that can be done without surgery to make greed and lack of empathy look good.

The clientele:

Cat-woman: you know about that woman in NY who did all those operations to look like a cat b/c that was her husbad's favorite animal? Well, he left her anyway. The woman next to me looks like her (hideous) plus she looks like a hooker w/ the 20 cm heels and some cheap glitter on her heels and around the neck. The black, thick eyeliner and the milk-carton under her hair to finishes off the Muslim hooker look.

Elephant-woman: Arab woman w/ gigantic elephant-head and a pair of furry eyebrows that would bring a 70 yr old man to shame. She looks as if she's about to cry - the normal look of the bitchy, complaining, unsatisfied Arab women.

To break it up I also have a British trash woman opposite me dressed in a pink jump-suit getting something done about the black bags under her eyes.

So here I am, in a zoo, getting my toe-nails picked by some poor Philipino lady who was born in the wrong country to the wrong parents and who does not happen to have a Stem MBA and work for an over-funded, American, Jewish, gay university.

My career has moved in the direction of organizing events and manage / entertain visitors to the university. This Sunday I have organized a lecture for a professor giving a talk about sexual networks and STDs...

Have a great trick or treat weekend!