To: Jeffrey EpsteinUeevacationelgmail.comj
From:
Sent Thur 9/9/2010 7:27:13 PM
Subject Fw: Cows and politics

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From: aymon.brunel®hsbc.fr
Date: Thu, 9 Sep 2010 09:34:52 +0200
To: <ab@tectona.net>; Cjeanluc@gmail.com>
Subject: Fw: Cows and politics

From: Diego Olaechea [IL]
Sent: 09/09/2010 07:15 CET
To: Aymon BRUNEL
Subject: Cows and politics

## Cows and Politics

<table><tr><th>DEMOCRATIC</th><th>You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful.
Barbara Streisand sings for you.</th></tr><tr><td>REPUBLICAN</td><td>You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
So?</td></tr><tr><td>SOCIALIST</td><td>You have two cows.
The government takes one and gives it to your
neighbor.
You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his
Cow.</td></tr><tr><td></td><td>You <mark>have two cows.</mark></td></tr></table>

## Cows and Politics (cont.)

<table><tr><th>COMMUNIST</th><th>The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
You wait in line for hours to get it.
It is expensive and sour.</th></tr><tr><td>CAPITALISM,
AMERICAN
STYLE</td><td>You have two cows.
You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.</td></tr><tr><td>BUREAUCRACY,
AMERICAN
STYLE</td><td>You have two cows.
Under the new farm program the government pays you
to shoot one, milk the other, and then pours the milk
down the drain.</td></tr><tr><td>AMERICAN
CORPORATION</td><td>You have two cows.
You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd
one.
You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are
surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement
to the analysts stating you have downsized and are reducing
expenses.
Your stock goes up.</td></tr><tr><td>FRENCH
CORPORATION</td><td>You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
You go to lunch and drink wine.
Life is good.</td></tr><tr><td>JAPANESE
CORPORATION</td><td>You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an
ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
Most are at the top of their class at cow school.</td></tr></table>

## Cows and Politics (cont.)

<table><tr><th>GERMAN
CORPORATION</th><th>You have two cows.
You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of
beer, give excellent quality milk, and run a hundred
miles an hour.
Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation
per year.</th></tr><tr><td>ITALIAN
CORPORATION</td><td>You have two cows but you don't know where they are.
While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.
You break for lunch.
Life is good.</td></tr><tr><td>RUSSIAN
CORPORATION</td><td>You have two cows.
You have some vodka.
You count them and learn you have five cows.
You have some more vodka.
The Mafia shows up and takes over however many
cows you really have.</td></tr><tr><td>TALIBAN
CORPORATION</td><td>You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two.
You don't milk them because you cannot touch any
creature's private parts.
You get a $40 million grant from the US government to
find alternatives to milk production but use the money
to buy weapons.</td></tr><tr><td>IRAQI
CORPORATION</td><td>You have two cows.
They go into hiding.
They send radio tapes of their mooing.</td></tr><tr><td>POLISH
CORPORATION</td><td>You have two bulls.
Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting
to milk them.</td></tr><tr><td>BELGIAN</td><td>You have one cow.
The cow is schizophrenic.
Sometimes the cow thinks he's French, other times he's</td></tr></table>

## Cows and Politics (cont.)

<table><tr><th>CORPORATION</th><th>Flemish.
The Flemish cow won't share with the French cow.
The French cow wants control of the Flemish cow's milk.
The cow asks permission to be cut in half.
The cow dies happy.</th></tr><tr><td>FLORIDA
CORPORATION</td><td>You have a black cow and a brown cow.
Everyone votes for the best looking one.
Some of the people who actually like the brown one best
accidentally vote for the black one.
Some people vote for both.
Some people vote for neither.
Some people can't figure out how to vote at all.
Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which
one you think is the best-looking cow.</td></tr><tr><td>CALIFORNIA
CORPORATION</td><td>You have millions of cows.
They make real California cheese.
Only five speak English.
Most are illegal's.
Arnold likes the ones with the big udders.</td></tr></table>

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